On Traditional Elven Hospitality

The following observation is only marginally related to dietary practice, but I include it as a warning to field researchers. Traditional Elven hospitality is generous, sincere, and often founded upon assumptions about what constitutes food which are not universally shared.

During my first visit to the southern groves, I was presented with a bowl containing nuts, seeds, flower pods, several varieties of fungus, and a translucent substance which I initially took to be preserved fruit. It was not fruit. When I asked what it was, my host gave me a word which translated approximately as “that which grows upon the shaded side of the old stones after rain.” I asked whether it was safe to eat. He seemed offended by the question and ate some himself, which proved nothing, as he was an Elf. I ate it anyway, and it was excellent.

I have since attempted to identify the substance botanically and have failed. Three Elven naturalists have provided three different classifications. One insists it is a lichen, another that calling it a lichen is sacrilegious. The third told me to stop dissecting lunch.